Sibling Goals.
To be honest, that was the first time I was seeing that phrase.
We often see ‘Relationship Goals‘, ‘Marriage Goals’, ‘Career Goals‘. I once saw ‘Baby room goals‘, when someone shared the picture of her daughter’s room.
But Sibling Goals was new. The comment appeared on my social media feed when someone updated a picture of his siblings.
In the ensuing conversation, I realised that a lot of people are not very close to their siblings. Hugs and ‘I Love Yous’ were out of the question. That’s fine. Quite a lot of Nigerian families are not big on Hugs and I Love Yous, and siblings get into this habit usually when they are much older.
‘We don’t even always remember each other’s birthday’. I was kind of shocked at that comment. I sometimes need two seconds to remember how old my siblings are (I always think they are much younger) but I never forget their birthdays.
I remember before my last sister was born. We were already four kids: 2 boys and 2 girls. So each team was so keen to have an additional member. Obviously, the girls won. I vaguely remember us sitting on the floor gathering round my mum and singing ‘My mummy is having a baby, it’s coming from heaven above, my mummy is having a baby, we’ll give it a name, it’s all been arranged and most important of all we’d give it our love’ (Please does anyone remember this song?)
Growing up, we didn’t have that perfect sibling bond – we had the usual fights and quarrels. I particularly remember an episode of my sister tipping a plate of spaghetti over my head. She also hated to share her clothes or belongings. But we often wore matching clothes – the one time we wore yellow dungarees was my best!. We were so cute.
My elder brother and I often fought for the computer. When I got the chance I’ll lock myself in my parents’ room watching Sound of Music over and over again. I played football with him and his friends – but I’m not quite sure why he never picked me to be on his team. After our house had been burgled a couple of times, we were watching a TV show which had lots of soldiers, so my brother and I used a bat to hit the TV, so the soldiers could come and guard our house. (Someone told me this story, I refuse to believe I was ever that dumb).
Because of my youngest sister, I’m so scared of carrying babies. When I was nine, and she a few weeks old, I was carrying her on my shoulders and she fell from my hands back onto the ground. I’ve lived with that fear for a long time now! I also remember one time I was very upset with her ‘How dare you shave your eyebrows at 13?’. Now she has the ‘fleekiest’ eyebrows of us three and sent me step by step photos a few weeks ago. I still can’t get the hang of it.
Interestingly I can’t remember any childhood quarrels with my younger brother. I’m sure there were many though. I thought he was going to become a comedian – he had jokes! We’ll record these and I often shared with my room-mates at school. Some of them still ask ‘How’s that your funny brother?’. We deceived him a lot though, especially when we wanted to eat his food. All you had to do was pretend to cough without covering your mouth – that’s it. He wasn’t eating any more. And then, he started this thing of how you had to cover your bum when you farted. Haha.
I wish I had all these childhood moments on video. I couldn’t even imagine life without my siblings. In recent times, we had dubbed Saturday morning in the house as ‘Sharing Life Issues Time’. It was a mockery of a real radio show called Sharing Life Issues. We would sit on one spot from 9 am till about 1 pm – talking, laughing and arguing. Till my mum realises that ‘This can’t be right in an African household’, and begins to dish out orders for chores to be done.
It feels a bit weird sometimes, that I’m now married and out of the house. But hey, life happens and each person with their own daily challenges.
We’ve gone through so much together – good and not-so-good and all I want for us all is Happiness. And Fulfilment. Pure and Unadulterated.
And oh, as per sibling goals: I really want a vacation with the 5 of us in an exotic beach, perfectly toned bodies and credit cards that we aren’t afraid to swipe. Throw in lots of laughter and cocktails for me of course. That’ll come soon! I can feel it…
Are you really close to your siblings? Share your fondest memories and your sibling goals!
If you are not, I think it’s worth making an effort. It’s never too late.
Love,
Kachee… Xx
pS: When your younger brother who is still in Uni saves all his money and buys cartons of champagne to pop at your wedding, that’s definitely Sibling Goals right? He had to pop about 4 bottles to get that picture. Lol!
ppS: Apparently, it was National Sibling Day on April 10. Seems there’s a day for everything these days.
karen
April 15, 2016 at 14:25Omg! !I’m literally crying..I can remember every little thing that happened (except for you almost breaking my head of course.lol) Thank God for all of us mehn! Don’t worry sissy, that vacation will happen soon..I can feel it. .
Onyii
April 15, 2016 at 18:26I can feel it too….lol
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
April 16, 2016 at 19:56Yay! First time commenting. Thank you… And thanks for feeling it!!! Xx
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
April 18, 2016 at 08:58I’m pretty sure you can’t remember everything. Lol. You probably remember the gists we gave you. Sorry about almost breaking your head. Hahaha. Xx
BagosMutendiBlog
April 15, 2016 at 14:33We were close-knit and still are today. Wasnt a bed of roses growing up without my mum for the better of my life (being the last born) but they covered up real nice. We even have a family whatsapp chat group devoid of the wives and children of course where we share jokes we made of our parents growing up, talk business, and virtually everything. I wouldn’t trade my family for the world. They are my rock!
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
April 18, 2016 at 09:00Awwww. It must have been tough growing up without your mum. I’m so thankful your siblings were there and covered up really nicely. Family really is everything. Have a great week dear! xX
wawa
April 15, 2016 at 16:42I love my siblings a lot and i can go to moon for them.lol! Growing up was fun for us, my mum always dressed my immediate younger sister and I in similar clothes and one day I told her we were not twins and I didn’t want to dressed in the same clothes as my sister anymore. I have loads of pictures of my childhood and even videos. Oh we also played tricks on my baby sister and we used her to get favours from the parents. Even now our days are not complete till we speak to each other and we are all in various locations. I love my sisters cos they’ve got my back and I got theirs😍 This is a lovely post as it got me thinking of growing up and I am happy as looking back I can only smile.
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
April 18, 2016 at 09:03Did your sister actually believe you were twins? That’s hilarious! You have videos of your childhood? That’s something I plan to do for my kids. Like that Ed Sheeran’s video ‘Photograph’, where he used his childhood memories. Love it!. Thank you so much for sharing and dropping a comment Wawa! Xx
KC
April 15, 2016 at 16:57I wasn’t really close to my siblings. Actually it was ‘me’ vs. ‘them’ (2 sisters and 1 brother) team. Not sure if it was a personality issue (i really loved me and my private space, never willing to share) or maybe it was because of my mom blâmed me for most misconduct in the home because I am the eldest. I think I am leaning towards the personality issue thing because I never really made a conscious effort to have fun with my siblings. I envied them though because they were like The Three Musketeers. I remember my aunties complaining bitterly that I was too mature for my age, and that I needed to loosen up. Surprisingly, NOW, I can’t believe how close I am to my siblings. I have unbelievably learnt so much about and from them. But I think this is tantamount to the fact that I had to loosen up a bit, especially now that I have to deal with one big baby and potential small babies for the rest of my life.
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
April 18, 2016 at 08:57Hahahahaha. I totally get what you mean. It was almost that way with my sibs as well. The three younger ones went to the same school and so bonded quite easily, while I was in boarding school and away from the house. It’s a great thing we’ve loosened up! Thanks for sharing. Xx
Nedoux
April 16, 2016 at 22:59Hi Kachee,This was a cute post. :-)My sister and I fought a lot when we were much younger, I didn’t like sharing my things, still don’t. LolNow, we are pretty close these days, talk to each other nearly everyday and laugh a lot.
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
April 18, 2016 at 08:54Thank you Nedoux!I think most people fought when they were younger. Glad that you have a good relationship now though!
KIKELOMO OMOTALADE
April 22, 2016 at 12:40I was a terrorist to my immediate sister for reasons I laugh about today. For some reasons best known to nature, she could tell the time before me and she stopped wetting the bed before me so my respect was under the carpet. To get my respect(at least so i thought then), any time she misbehaves my strength will roar and i would beat her mercilessly…..hehehe but we all cool now and I love my siblings greatly.Your brother though…..lol
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
April 26, 2016 at 00:00Trust me, my brother was a clown.I hope your younger sister currently terrorises you with this information – that she stopped bed-wetting before you!
Berry Dakara
April 24, 2016 at 02:52My siblings and I are close… although my brother is closest to my youngest sister – keeping secrets from me and my immediate younger sister. There’s one year between my sister and I, then 8 years between my youngest sister and I, and 12 years between my brother and I.One of my mum’s favorite memories of us is walking into a room, and my sister and I were laughing hysterically. She asked me why I was laughing, and I didn’t know. I was just laughing because my sister was laughing, and I didn’t know what she was laughing at.:)Berry Dakara Blog
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
April 25, 2016 at 23:58Hahahaa. Follow Follow. Laughing for no reason. It’s kind of cute though. I just tried to picture little berry, and for some reason I see chubby cheeks. Lol!!
Abby
September 17, 2016 at 10:05Lmao at the soldiers story. Can’t even share the things I believed when I was younger cos I can’t imagine I could have been such a blondie😭Interesting read! I’m the sister who didn’t like sharing her stuff 😭😭😭 but I think I’ve become more accommodating now. And as we get older my sister and I are slowly understanding each other moreIt makes me happy seeing people that have a really tight bond with their siblings. I think it’s really beautiful ❤️
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
September 17, 2016 at 11:23Same here. My sisters and I are understanding each other better as we go older. not sure many people willingly liked to share stuff! Me too, I love sibling tight bonds and I pray my kids are that way!
Muna
February 4, 2020 at 20:35Awwwwwww this post is so relatable! I was “ahn, what doesn’t have goals again o” when I saw the title. We’re 3 girls and 2 boys too and I’m the last. I remember I used to send my sisters’ step by step eyebrow tutorials too, haha! My sibling goal is definitely all 5 of us plus our parents vacationing together. I should add all 5 of us, partners and kids cos 3 people are off the marriage market. This was such a good read! Weldon!
Your tongue is powerful
Kachi Tila-Adesina
February 10, 2020 at 17:44Thanks Muna! Everything has goals these days. I’ve enjoyed seeing your siblings weddings on social media. I’m the only one married of us 5. Yes to that vacation soon!