My friend who’s also a new mum recently shared on Facebook that amongst other motherhood lessons, she has now learned to differentiate between the sounds of baby’s fart & baby’s poo. I’m not quite there yet in that regard. Sometimes I hear a really loud sound of what I assume to be poo, only to check the diaper and see nothing or just pee!
Anyway, it’s one month already of being a mum and parenting. Sometimes it feels like time is flying and I only just gave birth to him yesterday. Other times I feel like I’ve been doing this forever.
First, I owe you guys a huge thank you for all your wishes when I announced that we’d had a baby! I could genuinely feel the joy and excitement from this community and I appreciated it a million times over. And just maybe I owe you an apology as well for keeping it away. It clearly came as a surprise and some people even said they felt betrayed. Lol! Others said they suspected and were almost certain. I really wanted to share with you at some point, and it was a hard one to keep but I’m sure you understand. But I’m excited to share the events in retrospect and all the details going forward.
Needless to say it’s been interesting being a mum and I thought to do a one month update sharing my experience – particularly relating to some of the most frequent questions we got asked, advice we’ve received and life with a new born generally.
I know some people take offence to this question but I didn’t and still don’t. In conversation with friends and in relating the birth story it’s bound to come up. It only depends on the motive of the asker. I didn’t have a CS but was somewhat voluntarily asking for one at some point just to avoid the pain. So honestly the most important thing is healthy mother and healthy baby. Along with this question also comes related questions like did you use pain relief? Any tears or stitches etc? I’ll have to share all of that in the birth story!
Understandably this was expected. And although Tee & I had agreed on his names by the time he was born, we couldn’t readily share this information until the 7th day after when we had a naming ceremony as is the Yoruba culture – where the names are officially pronounced and blessed. He has other names from family but his official names are: Jidenna Jeremi
~ Jidenna is an Igbo name which means “Hold on to the Father” (i.e God)
~ Jeremi is a Yoruba name which means “Profit from Me”
He has an Igbo first name as his mum is Igbo and we wanted him to be associated with both parts of his culture.
We also got asked a lot who baby looks like. Pretty much everyone thinks he looks like Tee!
Ok this was asked by my mum. She came in two days after he was born and was surprised to see my stomach bare and not strapped. Now, for centuries, women have been strapping or tying up their bellies immediately after having a baby and this helps the stomach go back into shape. I knew of this and was definitely going to, so I bought the 3-in-1 post partum waist belt recommended by my friends.
However, I didn’t take it with me to the hospital as I didn’t think I’d be there more than a day. When I realised we’d be there longer, I wondered if it was a bit vain to ask Tee to go home & get it. Well, when my mum asked the question, I got on it. I’ve been wearing it pretty religiously since then and there’s some good progress!
As mentioned in my 38 week pregnancy tag post I almost cried when I couldn’t fit into my pants anymore. But hey! I tried on those exact pants and although it’s a little snug, I can pretty much fit right back in it! A number of people have advised that weight gain often comes after birth especially when breastfeeding – so I’m trying not to over eat and hopefully incorporate a few exercises once we hit the six week mark.
We got asked this question by a number of Nigerians especially those who live here in the UK. In Nigeria and some other countries it’s a routine vaccination given at birth against tuberculosis (TB). But in the UK it’s only given to new borns who may be at risk; and to new borns whose parents are from certain countries were TB might be an issue. Since we are both Nigerians the hospital raised it and asked if we’d like to have it. Unfortunately the nurse who administers BCG was unavailable at that time and so we’ve had to reschedule that.
Male child circumcision is not a routine procedure in the UK, and so one that has to be done privately. We therefore booked an independent private and regulated circumcision clinic in the UK to get it done. It’s best when it’s done during the early days after birth and so we arranged for this when the lil one was just about two weeks. I knew that I couldn’t bear to be in there while the procedure was carried out. So my mum and Tee were there with him. I could hear his screams though from outside the room. He was given an anaesthetic, so didn’t actually feel pain, but was just cranky from discomfort. But it’s all healed up perfectly now.
That’s pretty much it for the questions.
In terms of life with a newborn this basically involves feeding, bath, diaper change & sleeping – round the clock! And a few concerns about health and well being.
Breastfeeding can be tough – and that’s the sad reality. I hoped that once the baby comes out, breast milk would literally flow so easily. Well well, few days in and couldn’t quite get up to 50ml pumped! So ofcourse I’ve received a lot of advice about breast milk supplements and tips to enhance flow including drinking lots and lots of warm water.
In terms of feeding though the lil one is such a star and his latch was awesome from day 1. The nurses were impressed. So he does feed very well. I find myself feeding him from the left boob more as it’s more comfortable and allows me to use my right hand. However, I need to consciously switch to the right! I really love the bond with him while breast feeding but still have to think up creative ways to maximise breastfeeding time.
I had a drip attached to my arm post birth & Tee did the first diaper change without any help. I actually kinda like them. They aren’t too bad at all. Except that one has to be quick to avoid been peed on – as Tee has been rather too often. That’s because he spends half the time playing & laughing before putting on a new diaper. I’m often much quicker. Old paper out and new one in as fast as I can!
Again, as we were in the hospital for about a week, we didn’t have to bathe him during that time and only just wiped his body. Plus, in the UK, the midwives preach that babies do not have to be bathed for the first few days and the vernix which covers them at birth is great for their skin and is to be absorbed. Despite this, we were looking forward to giving him a bath as we just knew that he’d feel and look better. And yes we did that as soon as we got home!
I haven’t bathe him myself yet since my mum’s being around and been helping with that. As babies are in water before they’re born you’d think they’d love the water. Sometimes he does and totally looks like he could sleep off in the bath… other times it almost feels like war. One thing that’s working for us is making sure he’s just eaten before a bath. So he’s all calm!
He literally slept through the first night at the hospital and Tee & I were like “Yes!”. Looking back now he was probably just tired from his arrival and journey into the world. Personally the night seems to be the toughest part; considering how much I love my sleep! For now he sleeps quite a bit during the day and then we’re awake feeding through the night.
People often say “sleep when baby sleeps during the day“. But that doesn’t always work because there’s so much to be done during the day. Or basically one just wants to chill and catch up on other things. Plus no matter how much I sleep during the day it’s still tough to be awake at night. I’m looking forward to a set routine when we sleep through the night!
I know new mums worry about every little thing! For some reason I don’t fret a lot. Another new mum friend asked if our lil one hiccups a lot as she finds it scary! I responded that he does, but as I mentioned in my 1st – 3rd trimester diary, he had been hiccuping from the womb. My mum suggests putting a piece of white cloth on his head. I tease her that it’s an old wives tale and really doesn’t work.
I was slightly worried by the rash he seemed to have on his face as I couldn’t tell if it was an allergic reaction or not. It’s all clearing up now thankfully; and everything else seems fine. He’s also had bouts of stomach upsets – but again that often happens and gripe water or similar solutions often help.
That’s pretty much how our month has been! We’ve gone out a couple of times – to church, clinic appointments, photoshoot, birth registration etc. But other than that I’m spending a lot of time indoors and watching too much TV! My mum has been such a huge help as well – with cooking and holding him when I need a minute. And of course, Tee’s always ready to do so much.
I wouldn’t say it’s been an overwhelming month. For me, think it was important to have the right mindset before the baby arrives. So I consciously prepared my mind and disposition to the fact that I may be getting less sleep and be stuck in camis and joggers all day. It’s not been a breeze, but this has sure helped.
Generally, we’re trying to appreciate each moment and capture them with lots of photos and videos! Because as they say in the blink of an eye, and by God’s grace we’d be planning his first birthday!
He’s also generally a very calm baby – once he isn’t hungry! He fascinates me. Yes, that’s the word – fascinates. The expressions he makes with his mouth, the way he stretches his body, his little cries and coos and how he gazes at me like he recognises me! I know I’m smitten, and definitely glad month one has been conquered. Hopefully it only gets better from here.
If you’re a momma how was the first month? Overwhelming or you just eased into it easily?
pS: Photos above are from his 8 day photoshoot which we had with Sheree of Sheree B Photography. She was amazing and if you need a new born photographer in the Buckinghamshire area in the UK, do check her out!
ppS: I haven’t had enough time to reply comments lately but I’m reading & loving them! So please do share your thoughts.
Read too: 38 Weeks, a Pregnancy Tag + Bump Photoshoot and Pregnancy Diaries: 1st – 3rd Trimester and 9 Mummy Bloggers on Being Ready to Have Kids, Greatest fear & Rewards.
Kemisola OyinladeNovember 28, 2017 at 08:34
Very interesting read!He’s so adorable and I love his names. Particularly Jeremi. Unique and beautiful. Well done mummy 😊
AishaDecember 8, 2017 at 15:21
Oh wow someone bears exactly my name and not variations like Oyinade. This is strange. Lol hi! Bye! Nice to see. 😂😂❤️❤️
mideNovember 28, 2017 at 08:53
Awww I love his names! Perfect for a cutie like him.Congrats again to you guys!May God continue to strengthen you and Tee.
TunrieNovember 28, 2017 at 08:57
May God bless this little guy, Jidenna Jeremi and his mum, Kachee and dad, Tee. Will the blog now become KacheeTeeJee? I literally just added this post-partum support to my cart.. why why why? Sending best wishes your wayyy!
Kachee || KacheeTee.comNovember 28, 2017 at 09:03
Loool! KacheeTeeJee. This made me laugh out loud! 😂 Thank you love.
Seun OlagunjuNovember 28, 2017 at 12:58
His names are beautiful, Kachi. Help send my regards and kisses.
AfomaNovember 28, 2017 at 10:00
Awwww! Jidenna!! So cute!! You’re doing amazing, sweetie! I can’t even imagine what it’s like adjusting. Like you said, it’s all about perspective and you’ve definitely got the right perspective. Keep enjoying your little one!afomaumesi.com
Eziaha Bolaji-OlojoNovember 28, 2017 at 12:35
ah thank God for your mom. YOU ARE BLESSED. Those rashes??? i was worried sick FOR NOTHING. They cleared up on their own.i LOVE THIS POST cause i can relate.Soak in every moment boo. THEY are so precious
Eziaha Bolaji-OlojoNovember 28, 2017 at 12:36
oh i love Jidenna tooooooooooooooooooooo
Seun OlagunjuNovember 28, 2017 at 12:57
KelechiNovember 28, 2017 at 15:10
Aww I love it! He is so adorable and I love the name Jidenna! Congrats again!!!
'DaraNovember 28, 2017 at 15:12
I love his names!!! It’s funny how ‘Jidenna’ sounds a little bit like a Yoruba name (Jide). It definitely has been an amazing first mothering month for you.
SkyNovember 28, 2017 at 17:22
Such beautiful names!Thanks to God for a great one-month. The rest of your lives will also be a breeze in Jesus name.x.
Yummy Mum LifeNovember 28, 2017 at 17:26
Beautiful family photo!Sleeping when baby sleeps never works for me.congrats again!
DemiladeNovember 28, 2017 at 18:19
No need to apologize for keeping your pregnancy away from the blog Kachee, it was such a pleasant surprise. His names are so beautiful and so is he. Loved reading this, glad everything is going great :)Coco Bella Blog
TieseNovember 28, 2017 at 18:31
Aww you definitely had every right to keep the pregnancy to yourself! His names are so lovely + love the meanings too. I find it so so cute that you’re fascinated by pretty much his every move. Was smiling reading that. Here’s to better months ahead!
Bubu GreenNovember 29, 2017 at 10:49
You’re doing great, Kachee. The names are so cool. I immediately called him “J.J” in my head. It’s okay to keep the news away because it eventually became a pleasant surprise. Don’t worry about the rashes, even if it comes back. Babies tend to have them a lot at the early stage. Especially on face and neck but they go away. You are doing great, my dear. Keep it up. http://www.bubusboulevard.com
Diyan'EbeNovember 29, 2017 at 23:29
Awwww… Can we just talk about how GREAT your photos have been? His names are beautiful in every sense of the word. Even with all the ups and downs which could come with having a baby, it’s a whole new world and I really see your home overflowing with so much happiness! Sending so much love your way.becauseibelieveblog.com
Precious NkeihNovember 30, 2017 at 05:56
Such amazing photos, Kachee! I’m so so happy for you. And seriously, this is giving me baby fever. Enjoy your time with your little man.
Unravelling NigeriaNovember 30, 2017 at 15:37
Great piece, makes me think about being a mum even though I’m nervous too.Still have a couple of steps to go through before becoming a mother so till then.Enjoy being indoors, it can be hard especially when you’re used to being busy but it’s nice to just sit and do nothing.
Desire UbaNovember 30, 2017 at 20:55
Awww,I really didn’t want this post to end. Your articles are always oh so engaging!!I loovee his names, they are beautiful!Jidenna is blessed!! Already low-key called him JJ in my mind.www.desireuba.wordpress.com
TheImmigrantsJourneyDecember 1, 2017 at 20:01
The first few months are so surreal and really go by fast. I cant believe i just said some time go by fast myself, but it does. Nights when baby seems to have an alarm clock in his/her body, and wakes up evry 1- 2 hours may come. When its happening, you may shed a tear or two from exhaustion, but enjoy the MOMENT and take plenty of actual pictures and mental snapshots! :)God bless our granmas n granpas! God bless calm baby Jidenna! And you and hubby are doing great! :*
winifred oribhaborDecember 2, 2017 at 04:25
wow, there’s a lot that goes into this. I’m proud of you Kachi. Thank God your mom is around! that makes things better and that the baby is doing okay too!
TolaDecember 2, 2017 at 16:29
Awww the pictures are amazing and thank God for your mum and I’m so glad you are not feeling overwhelmed ❤️❤️www.adoseoftola.wordpress.com
Phaytea's PulseDecember 3, 2017 at 04:37
Loved reading your experience and that mum is there to support… That’s like having most of your worries handled.And I so love his names….now I know a second Jidenna….You are an awesome mum already so just glide through the remaining period….Sending kind thoughts
YewandeDecember 5, 2017 at 03:33
Well done Kachi!My daughter just clocked 2 months yesterday. It is indeed overwhelming as I end up being super-tired at the end of each day. I also miss my ‘me time’. It still feels so surreal that such pretty little being came out of me. I find myself constantly gazing at her all the time.I still can’t get over the different sounds she makes. I have mastered it so much that I now know what each sound means.She also loves to bath like Jeremy (as long as she is not hungry). My husband and I do routine shifts on who should feed, carry and bath the baby (grandma left a week ago so ish just got reeeaal). Once she is asleep, I literally rush to do most things which were left hanging.My baby LOVES attention and it is sometimes challenging for me because she never wants to be by herself. I got her a pacifier and a bouncer; these have helped a bit although not totally.As for waking up at night, I have had to cut down on my night sleep as I constantly spend time rubbing her back to ensure that she burps after each feed. Breastfeeding her has been a bit difficult because she rarely sucks the boobs. I had to start using a breast pump. Although it is an uphill task, pumping has helped me gauge the amount of milk she takes per day.Luckily, I have my flat belly back. It’s hard to tell that I just had a baby because my snap back game was 100 percent! All my old clothes fit too.Being a mom is a very exciting journey, although there are days when I feel like she should just grow fast so my stress will be less!!!
The Ajala BugDecember 5, 2017 at 11:06
I love reading ALL your articles. There’s always something reassuring and educative about them.Congratulations again and thank God for support systems. I actually freak out when I hear the tales/miracle of putting to bed and how life changes afterwards. It’s all in the mind, I guess. Enjoy the indoors and God bless your home.
AishaDecember 8, 2017 at 15:13
So lovely to read all of this. I think it’s a ritual newborns have to pee on you during diaper change. 😂😂And his name is really nice. May you Jere him. 🙏🙏 (Lol Yoruba translation)
Nneka AgbimDecember 9, 2017 at 07:36
I’m still trying to work out what your new family name should be- KacheeTeeJay? KacheeTeeJayJay? KacheeTeeJiJer? Please decide and let us know! Love you so much and love your growing family! Thank you so much for sharing so much on the blog and also sharing on the phone when you can. Looking forward to a sushi date when next we see
Ijeoma UcheibeDecember 16, 2017 at 20:47
I’m genuinely happy to see how well you have handled this journey to being a mother. God will see you through.
Michelle Barner McKeeDecember 29, 2017 at 22:49
Congratulations! I love your blog! God bless you!
AbbyDecember 30, 2017 at 18:20
Love his names!You’re doing a great job Sis! Bless the lil one! Beautiful pictures!! And he sure looks like TeeXx
FavourJanuary 5, 2018 at 13:09
Baby is cute. Even though I can barely see his face but I sense cuteness in there 😁. very lovely names. The rashes may be heat and like you said, a reaction to something. Don’t worry too much, God is with you and your baby. (look at me sounding like a pastor) ♥️
Lizzy TheDIYLadyMay 18, 2018 at 17:58
So beautiful. I love how you mentioned preparing yourself mentally before his arrival. Taking notes.
Kachee || KacheeTee.comMay 29, 2018 at 09:10
Thank you Lizzy! Looking forward to all your experiences too. Xx