
These are one-liners, but pretty hilarious!
I really love a good joke or riddle, and I’m not sure why anyone wouldn’t!
So when I stumbled on these and after sharing some with Tee, I said to him “You know I have to blog about this right?”.
I wish I had shared them earlier so you could use them on Christmas Day, but it’s still the holiday season, so I’m sure it’s still useful. Most of them are actually riddles though so you could see how smart your friends are. A few came up at our office Christmas party and definitely got a lot of laughter around the table.
Let’s get right into it!
1. What is the best Christmas present in the world
2. What do you get if you cross a bell with a skunk?
3. Why are Christmas Trees like bad Knitters?
4. What did the beaver say to the Christmas Tree?
5. What Christmas carol is heard in the Desert?
6. What did Adam say too his wife on the day before Christmas
7. What do you call a cat in the desert?
8. What song do you sing at a snowman’s birthday party?
9. What do you get when you meet a snowman with a vampire?
10. Who is Santa’s favourite Singer?
11. What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?
12. What do Santa’s little helpers learn at school?
13. What did Santa say to the smoker?
14. What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck?
15. Why did Santa’s helper see the doctor?
16. Why does Santa have three gardens?
17. What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a Chimney?
(This one took me a while to get!.. Like Santa Claus.. Claustrophobia!)
18. What happened to the man who stole an Advent Calendar?
19. Why is it getting harder to buy Advent calendars
Related: 24 Do-able Activities for Your Advent Calendar
20. What Athlete is warmest in winter?
21. What did the stamp say to the Christmas card?
22. Why did no one bid for Rudolph and Blitzen on eBay?
23. Did Rudolph go to school?
24. What do you have in December that you don’t have in any other month?
25. How does a snowman lose weight?
26. Which football team did the baby Jesus support?
27. What do you call an old snowman?
28. Who delivers presents to cats?
29. Why don’t you ever see a Santa at the hospital?
30. What do you get if you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?
A pineapple!
(Get it? The living Christmas trees are called Pines)
31. What is the worst disease that you get at Christmas?
32. How do sheep in Spain say Merry Christmas?
33. Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
(Well, good play on Mincepie!)
34. What do snowmen eat for lunch?
35. Which of Santa’s reindeers have to mind their manners most?
36. Why does Santa go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
37. What do you get if you cross Santa with a detective?
38. What do you call Father Christmas in the beach?
39. What did the sea Say to Santa?
40. What is the most competitive season?
41. Why is Santa so good at karate?
42. What Christmas carol is a favourite of parents?
43. What do call Santa when he stops moving?
44. How do you scare a snowman?
45. How do you know when Santa’s in the room?
46. Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace?
47. What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
48. If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
49. What kind of ball doesn’t bounce?
50. Why did they let the chicken join the band?
51. What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas?
(Get it? He’s bald and can’t make a part on his hair!)
52. What do vampires put on their Christmas turkey?
53. How is the Christmas alphabet different from the ordinary alphabet?
54. Why wasn’t the turkey hungry at Christmas time?
55. What’s a dog’s favourite carol?
56. Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas party?
57. What Nationality is Santa Claus?
58. Rudolph was looking out the window when he said, “It’s going to rain.”
His wife asked, “How do you know?”
“Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
(Haha. Play on “Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer”!)
59. How do Christmas trees keep their breath fresh?
60. What do you call Rudolph when he has lots of snow in his ears?
61. What do you call a Christmas tree with a really big nose?
62. Where does Santa Hang his suit after Christmas?
63. What did one Christmas angel say to the other?
64. What is the favorite Mexican food of snowmen?
65. What did the spider request for Christmas?
66. How do you decorate canoes for Christmas?
67. What’s a wolf’s favourite carol?
Okay, the end!
I really started off intending to just share a few and then I couldn’t stop myself.
I know some are really cheesy and after the answers you’re like ‘oh common!’. But did you enjoy them even slightly? or you guessed most of the answers?
Leave us a comment, and share your favourites from above or any other good clean holiday jokes you’ve got. Also feel free to share the post with friends and family.
Love,
Kachee…xx
pS; This post slightly reminds me of how much fun I had on this: 85 Words That Are Different in American & British English. And if you need a few more laughs, check out this compilation of First Date Disaster Stories!. If you’re after something more serious, 25 Microsoft Word Shortcuts that are Definitely Worth Knowing is a good one!
ppS: It’s our first Christmas on the blog! Did you read my Christmas message to you!? Let’s connect on Social Media: @KacheeTee and don’t forget to subscribe to the blog!
Sogie
December 26, 2016 at 19:07This is a lot lol, didn’t even know up to 5 sef. Where do you find things like this sef? Hope Christmas was fun dear, happy holidays love, regards to TeeItsdivadiaries.com
A girl called
December 26, 2016 at 21:47😂😂😂😂 I’m cracked up, nice way to end my night today . Thanks Kachee I love quite a couple plus I have increases my humour lines for future reference
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
December 27, 2016 at 21:53I’m actually so glad you liked it! I was hoping I wasn’t the weird one. Hope you’re having a great holiday! Xx
favour moyse
December 27, 2016 at 04:55This one will not work in naija o.. I don’t even know up to 5 selfFAVOURMOYSE BLOG
middleclassnigeriangirl
December 27, 2016 at 23:14I had no idea in most. These ones are not for Nigerian type of Christmas. Here we talk rice and chicken and Christmas cloth.lolmiddleclassnigeriangirl.wor…
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
December 28, 2016 at 14:17Lool!I think it’s mostly just about the general words related to Christmas and so could apply to any region. But I do get your point!
Mitchell Awah
December 28, 2016 at 12:22LOL! I did enjoy them. And I only guessed one. Pineapple. I have no more to add.
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
December 28, 2016 at 14:16Glad you did!
Praise Abu
December 28, 2016 at 15:29Very witty and also funny. I liked this one;What did Adam say too his wife on the day before Christmas?It’s Christmas, Eve!. Also, the one about Santa saying smoking is not good for my elf (like health) and the one about elf is presley like Elvis Presley. So supprised that I understood most of them, I guess I’m that smart and I’ve always known that Nigeria is not really my first country afterall *lol*Happy holidays Kachi, I hope you enjoyed your christmas?My Style Look Book Series
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
January 3, 2017 at 12:33Hahaha. Your sense of humour is on point. Glad you liked some!I had a great Christmas thank you, and I know you did too.
Live In Ibadan
December 28, 2016 at 20:21The very reason why many nigerians like me will fail this is because of the accent attached. For example, you guys in the abroad pronounce it MAIN-CHESTER UNITED(manchester united) but we pronounce it MAAN-CHESTER UNITED(manchester united). Another example is the one you guys pronounce ELF-ABET(alphabet) while we pronounce it ALFA-BET(alphabet). Does any naija person agree with me?www.liveinibadan.blogspot.com
Rshanphonsi
December 29, 2016 at 11:01LOL… Had a good laugh, type to hype up my jokes game this christmas eve. lolwww.rshanphonsi.com
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
January 3, 2017 at 12:28So glad you enjoyed this! Good to know I’m not the only one with a funny sense of humour.
Ajibike 'Dammy
January 21, 2017 at 09:42All these jokes are hilarious! What did the stamp say to the letter? Stick with me. Tehehe Elf-is Presley! Having a good laugh over here.Lifeofdammy.com
Kachee || KacheeTee.com
January 22, 2017 at 09:18So glad you found them funny!! Lol